EDITORS NOTE: Please read this post before referring me to a shrink.

It made me retch. I’m not even sure why I do it. It’s like checking your bank-balance after getting wrecked in town the night before (something I also did today).

What am I talking about? John Gruber. He’s a blogger apparently, which doesn’t shine him in the best light. I’m a blogger after all, but I can barely string a sentence together. So I see him more as a journalist/writer, because it makes him sound more like a writer. What I really want to say is, he’s good at writing, and he writes a blog.

He writes for his blog called Daring Fireball, which is mainly about Apple products. Anyone who knows me will know where this is going now.

He’s a self-confessed Apple zealot. I’m sure he get’s off most nights by stroking Apple logos and preying to a picture of Steve Jobs. He really loves it.

The other day he wrote a piece on the new iPhone, and how it has re-defined perfection, again. It reads like an up-market soft-core porn film. He is expressing his arousal with every word.

Now. I’ve recently signed up for a HTC Desire phone. No-one is hiding the fact that it’s an iPhone clone. On few occasions, I’ve even called it an iPhone when showing it to others. I then go home, find a razor, and add another slit to my wrists.

It’s amazing, but it’s fundamentally different. The concept is similar. You have a huge narrow screen and you touch it with your fingers to navigate through screens using menus and icons. It’s a simple idea. The difference is the approach. The software is open to all manufacturers to use and modify. Users can add their own applications to it. Of course, they’re not called applications anymore, because Steve Jobs has amended the OED and added a clause whereby if you use a mobile phone you have to call it an app. Because it’s trendy.

John Gruber is amazing at writing. The issue my stomach contents has is his absolute belief in all Apple products being beautiful and usable and without flaw. I’ll give him the first two, but there’s a shit-load wrong with that company. It’s attitude towards being exclusive sucks. I’m not sure if Steve Jobs has a complex because it’s products lack the market-share acquired by Microsoft based machines, or if he feels that Macs are unsung because kids want to use MSN on their laptops or they consider it broken, or if he was bullied as a child for being so water-tourtureingly irritating, or whatever. It hurts me, because it’s a belief that hates diversity. It lives in a world where everything has an Apple logo embedded. It’s like the Aryan race in electronics form. A hundred years from now we’ll be teaching kids about a holocaust where everything Microsoft or Linux or Android or unlucky enough to not be pre-fixed with the lowercase-letter “i” got obliterated because it wasn’t good enough, because it dared to be different.

Every time I hear about Apple suing companies for daring to stand up to the hype, or Steve Jobs bragging about an innovation that’s been doing the rounds for the best part of a decade but it wasn’t relevant then because it didn’t have an Apple sticker on it, or see someone on the train telling me how their existence beats mine because they have an iBag or an iSock, my stomach goes again. I just know with a chilling certainty that in a few years I’ll have to conform and be affiliated with the rest of them whilst pledging my allegiance to Mr Jobs or be stripped and gassed to death, then my body ejected into space with all the porn and Adobe Flash software boxes where we all belong.

So yes. Apple have amazing products. They’re beautiful and flawless if you don’t care about doing things the same way that Jobs preaches. I understand. I’m just scared. Plus I have a compulsion to spend my money on alcohol and take-aways, so at the end of the month when the next new “iPhone 6.5G LS mkIII” comes out I can’t afford to fork out another grand to pay to the Apple-tax man. A crime that will surely be punishable by instant decapitation this time next year.

So John, as much as you dis-prove every little point that people try to make against your deity, and do it so well, I hate you. I don’t care if you’re right. When I wake up in the morning, my HTC Desire, a piece of unique electronic/plastic hybrid that is truly mine, that I customised, where I chose how it works or which hand I can hold it in, gives me so much joy and happiness. You give me so much pain and hate by rubbing in my face how wrong I should be. You give me so much pain and hate, that I had to compose a pie-chart to vent it all out.

If a hadn’t already written a million words I’d continue to explain every point. But I can’t. For now, I’ve ran out of hate.

And to make things clear, I copied that idea from this wicked cool website. If I was Apple, I would call it an iChart and patent it and then sue that guy instead. And he would sue me back and the world would be full of hate.

Disclaimer: Not everyone with an iFinger or iHairbrush is a twat. Some folks that use them are genuinely nice and have human feelings that don’t represent the Borg collective mind. My girlfriend has an iLaptop, and she’s very nice .

My brothers machine is for mindless entertainment. There’s one in the garage that I use to record and mix demos for bands that I’m in. Sometimes I’ll build web-sites if I’ve got any personal work on, be it for cash or my own perverted projects. This machine only get’s updated once a year though, because I won’t use it during winter. There isn’t any heating in the garage and I live in England.

Here’s a little fact, I’ve named them after Pokémon. Not just because I’m sad or I have a compulsion to name inanimate objects, but because they need to be referenced as separate machines when I’m setting the network up. Okay, I’ll admit, it’s a pure geek indulgence. Please don’t judge me.

My brother’s machine took all of five-minutes to install, followed by about a month to configure. Without the exaggeration, that’s about 3 hours to install and two-days of back-and-forth headless-ness to get it to work the way I like it to be.

The garage machine was a different kettle of fish. On my brothers machine I install a desktop version of Ubuntu, because it’s a desktop computer. On the other one, a version called Ubuntu Studio, for reasons I won’t patronise you with. For a start my DVD disc didn’t work, so I tried to install the desktop version and upgrade. Stupidest decision ever. It took about a week of messing around for me to give up (I’m not even joking here). I’ll put a brief geek synopsis under the graphic explaining why.

I burnt another copy and it installed fine. I say fine, it wasn’t what I expected, because it was supposed to install a “real-time” version of Linux, not a “generic” version. Why do I need it to be real-time? Because I’m recording audio, and this has to happen first and fast when the computer does it’s thing. The machine isn’t allowed to mess around prioritising YouTube videos or Chris Moyles’ whining from Radio 1 on the BBC iPlayer. It needs to be focused on capturing and recording all the audio I pump into it without jittering and jolting, all because someone sent me a message on Facebook for example. So to sumarise, Linux generic: good for being kept entertained by The Sims; Linux real-time: good for recording without Facebook notification alerts ruining a take.

There’s a messy reason why the latest Lucid Lynx version of Ubuntu Studio doesn’t come in real-time. I’m not really sure what it is, but it’s something to with the release schedule of Ubuntu being out of sync with the guys that make the real-time kernel. Okay, this post has claimed too many geek points now…

So… I’ve spent a lot of time staring at a blue screen with a progress bar on it. Because it takes so long, I have to do things to keep me alive, like move away and eat and drink occasionally, and sometimes sleep. Occasionally I pop back to check on the progress. To call it tedious is being very kind. Words can’t express the joy when it all ends.

So onto the geek list. I encountered a lot of problems. There are always niggles and the like that I can easily live without fixing. The issues were problematic. They either got side-stepped or conquered.

1. I couldn’t upgrade the repos off of the DVD when I wanted to update Ubuntu with the ubuntustudio-desktop package. It wouldn’t happen. I ended up reluctantly downloading gigabytes of data I already had because it wanted to use the Internet.
2. The drivers did work (I’m using nVidia). The monitor didn’t. I assume this is a problem with the drivers or the kernel. Windows was kind enough to lend be a raw EDID file, and I pointed X.org at that instead, thanks to the help of this Ubuntu Forums thread. Worked nicely.
3. I still have to use Windows NDIS drivers and a tedious unnecessary tutorial demonstrating how to get my Broadcom wireless card working under the NDIS-wrapper. The tutorial is very good. Without it I don’t think I’d have ever gotten online with Ubuntu.
4. Once I’d downloaded and installed ubuntustudio-desktop, ubuntustudio-audio and linux-rt I couldn’t get any of my audio applications, like Ardour and JACK, working. They crashed the entire desktop. It was infuriating.
5. After wiping and starting again with another disc of Ubuntu Studio, I bricked it by trying to install the RT kernel. So I had to do it AGAIN!

I’m now left with Ubuntu Studio Lucid Lynx, without a real-time kernel, quite bare and not configured because I haven’t had enough counseling to take another shot at it. I’ve read around about low-latency kernels and the like with the latest version of Linux that apparently work. I may give these a go. But when I see things like “incompatible with nVidia” or “compile from source” I start cutting my wrists with razor blades.

Well, I’ve spent all my money this month and all my close friends are away on holiday. I need this machine working because I’ve got some demos to finish for a band. All I have to do now is take a deep breath, start again and get on with it. Okay, here goes…

Ubuntu is heading for a milestone. In April they will release the latest version of their Operating System called Lucid Lynx. Every 6 months Ubuntu release a new version but this one will be a Long Term Support release, a version that is released every 2 years and supported for 3 years. This might not sound a long time (especially if you’re using the 9-year-old Windows XP) but in this modern world of the Internet and technology- it seems forever!

So what’s changed?

Well the thing that’s got e everyone in a fuss is the re-branding. Ubuntu previously sported a very friendly look, using “very large, almost Comic sans MS” font as I once described it. Now it’s moved on, and even the OS theme has been given a reboot.

When I first saw this screen-shot I described it as “overall looks like vomit”, but after installing the theme, turning the fonts down to 8px and using it for a few weeks, I love it. It’s beautiful.

The title-bar buttons being on the other side doesn’t bother me- I think I’ve gone to click on the right-hand side by accident three times in total so I’ve no idea what all the geeks out there are fussing about. I love the use of monochrome icons and the purple is certainly a lot better than the dullness of the brown previously used. If I could change anything about the new theme it would be the sprites used for the scroll-bars (I think they look a bit amateur-ish) and the buttons I think are too dark.

All in all- congratulations to the Ubuntu team. Looking good

Links
Brand – Ubuntu Wiki
LTS – Ubuntu Wiki
Ubuntu Branding revealed – Ubuntu forums
Inital Ubuntu forums poll

Rather than do the bi-annual Windows XP clean install, I ripped a disc and jammed in the latest Ubuntu. Karmic Koala it’s called.

This is the first time I’ve installed Ubuntu as opposed to Ubuntu Studio. Installation was a bit daunting. It does it all through the Live CD but it has to boot up like that first, and it took a while. I left it with a black screen for a few hours, came back to it, and selected “Install” off of the desktop.

After that it went okay. There were a few issues.

Look ma, no wires!

Getting the wireless working was the same as on my garage PC. I go through this NDIS Broadcom wireless walk-through and it works like a charm. NDIS is Windows driver and I’d rather use native Linux ones, but it works and that’s ultimately all I care about

I can see clearly now!

After all the trouble getting nVidia binaries working on Ubuntu Studio Jaunty (with the real-time kernel) I wasn’t looking forward to any graphics driver installation. As with the wireless, the graphics are also very similar (Gefore 5 and 6 series). However, the binaries in Ubuntu Studio Karmic worked fine straight away fresh out of the Hardware Drivers GUI (a tool for installing 3rd party binaries). Thankfully, it was the same on Ant’s PC. Nice one Karmic

Notifications kept popping up down a bit too far. I’m not sure if this is intentional, but I found an Ubuntu forums post to sort it out (again, still searching for that link ).

What did you say?

Then we had sound issues. I tried multiple Ubuntu forum tutorials trying to get it working but no luck. The first problem was how distant the sound was. I wasn’t getting the right frequencies, any stereo field and MP3 compression sounded crap. Turns out I’d dislodged the speaker’s mini-jack

My bro tried out Battle for Wesnoth, having played it on an openSUSE distro I’d tried out years ago. No sound though. I followed a simple Ubuntu forums tutorial linking to a blog post, fired up a deb file and got it up and working in seconds! (I’ve misplaced the link for now but I’ll keep searching for it!)

Jerk, jerk, jerk!

So with the sound almost fixed, there was one last issue. On my machine, Ubuntu Studio Karmic with Compiz and the works, is damn smooth (far smoother than Jaunty). Yet this machine was clunky as hell. The log-on sounds we’re stuttered. They still are, but they’re a lot better and I’m putting it down to low spec and filing it under I-don’t-care.

Spending some time in the terminal, I was getting error messages spat out at me left right and centre over and over again at a fierce rate of repetition. They went like this:

Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.512447] ata4.01: configured for PIO4
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.513091] ata4: EH complete
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.516020] ata4: drained 32768 bytes to clear DRQ.
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.584267] ata4.01: exception Emask 0x0 SAct 0x0 SErr 0x0 action 0x6 frozen
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.584275] ata4.01: ST_FIRST: DRQ=1 with device error, dev_stat 0x59
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.584289] ata4.01: cmd a0/00:00:00:24:00/00:00:00:00:00/b0 tag 0 pio 36 in
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.584291] cdb 12 00 00 00 24 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00 00
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.584293] res 59/00:01:00:24:00/00:00:00:00:00/b0 Emask 0x2 (HSM violation)
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.584298] ata4.01: status: { DRDY DRQ ERR }
Dec 13 13:54:51 bulbasaur kernel: [ 1783.584332] ata4: soft resetting link

Daunting, eh?

The logs kept growing, and I couldn’t open the Log File Viewer because it couldn’t take it (as expected). I begged for help on the forums but because the query was so hardware specific and such a generic error the cry was in vein.

Now I don’t know much of what those errors mean at all. A bit of Google’ing led me to stories of duff hard-drives, but I wasn’t buying any of that! I fiddled around with the insides and fixed it by un-plugging the CD/DVD-ROM drive. So it must’ve been a dodgy cable or unit. But again, I don’t care why, it works. Yay

There, Perfect!

It’s sweet. From all that error checking, I’ve beaten the first level of lagno (GNOME game, Reversi clone) which I’m very happy about. Even Rhythmbox doesn’t jerk (haven’t tried it in the garage properly yet – far too cold ). I love it, and my brother can now study his A-levels, play on Wesnoth and browse with Chrome.

Also, I hate to admit it, but it’s not bad looking. The brown kind of glows, the fonts are bubbly. It makes me smile when I use it. (I feel like I should be telling this to a shrink!) I’ve got no proper gripes and it’s helping me use my PC in the greatest ways possible.

I haven’t got down to any major road testing with Ubuntu Studio Karmic yet, mainly because it’s so damn cold in that garage. I’ve got band demos to record and websites to build. Studio Karmic will get a thrashing. But for now, I’m very happy with what I’ve got. Thank you Ubuntu

Before I would use Apache2 with mod_rewrite using a lengthy variation of this script:

RewriteCond %{THE_REQUEST} ^GET\ (.*)\.php\ HTTP
RewriteRule (.*)\.php$ $1 [R=301]
...

At the end I would hide server side files that I wouldn’t want accessible from the outside, such as templates and “spit out” scripts. The actual script I used would search for a PHP file with the requested name in it, and if it existed would spit it out else throwing up a 404.

I’ve thought of doing things differently this time around. I’m gonna do this – just use extensionless files. So for example, /httpdocs/home is now a PHP file that Apache will spit out to the user as HTML parsed from PHP. I just need to tell Apache this. The above code can be changed to this:

DefaultType application/x-httpd-php
...

I’d still need to hide some files but this approach means I don’t have to have as many files to catch the queries. I’ll have the content in the extensionless file with an include to the main script. That catches the content and brings in the templates.

On a different note

When I next get time I’m going to convert a Mac Mini into an Ubuntu server. I’m not sure if it’s PPC yet so it could be interesting. Currently I’m testing everything on the same machine I’m writing the stuff on, an old P4 Presario machine with Ubuntu Studio Jaunty on it, having no problems.

With a dedicated machine I could use another PC in the house, say a Windows one, SSH in and do my thing. I’ll be keeping things consistent. An actual testing server has many more advantages.

I’m busy with my band at the minute. Should really blog more about gigs and bands. Ah well, maybe soon

I used to use Windows XP as my main OS. I used Internet Explorer 7 to browse the net and was very happy doing so. It was sleek, the interface was good and performance wasn’t a problem. I tried Firefox 3 and like it’s approach to things.

But in no way would I dream of using it for casual browsing because it was slow to load up had a clumsy user experience (I wont get into why I think it does). I thought that the slow Firefox start was Microsoft’s fault but since migrating to Ubuntu Linux I’ve found this not to be the case and I’ve no idea who let the Ubuntu version look like that. I’m using a PC that I consider to have a reasonable spec – a Pentium 4 3GHz with a gig of RAM. I think it’s a shame (but I’m sure I could optimise my system a lot more).

However, at work I need to analyse web pages. Firebug is a dream. You’ve also got the Web Developer Toolbar by Chris Pederick that can do anything you can think of. I wish the functions and interfaces weren’t so fragmented but that’s what you get with an open customisable application like Firefox. As for doing the job it’s good. Aside from the 5 minute startup wait it’s a seamless experience (and this is at work with a Dual Core Xeon and twice the RAM!).

I’ve got my list of add-ons. Each one helps me almost daily. As you can probably see from the window-shot above I’ve made the interface as minimal as I can.

Then there was Google’s Chrome. As you may know Chrome makes me happy. I can develop with it but not as well as with Firefox. Once Firebug and Web Developer work for it it’s goodbye Firefox. Until then, I’m more than happy working with websites using Firefox. In my eyes it’s not a browser, it’s a powerful tool.

It’s fast. Oh it’s so fast. I still use Firefox for work because of the addons but Chrome shows it up big time. Google released it because there was a giant great big gaping hole in the market where folks were either defaulting or giving in to geek propaganda.

Honestly, Firefox is the slowest application to start up that I use. I use heavy applications like InDesign and Photoshop and they do powerful intensive stuff. Firefox is just slow and eats RAM even when closed down.

But this isn’t about that. I’m happy because now I can use a browser without having to take a strole while it starts up. I bet I couldn’t blink before Chrome starts up. [EDIT: Just tried, no I can't - but I am really tired ]

Look at it’s sleak interface with minimal fuss and size. Oh I love it. If Google release an OS like this Linux (as we know it) can pack it’s bags. Actually, maybe people with real lives using computers might catch on.

I downloaded and installed a theme called Dust. It’s about the only okay looking theme that comes with and probably exists for Jaunty. However, those browns and oranges try to creep back in again. I hope Karmic cuts that scheme and looks half decent.

Animation is something that Windows has never excelled in. Aero has fades and a bit of movement here and there and that crappy shuffle Mac rip-off thing with the Super-Tab, but from my experience it jerks too much and happens to swiftly to notice. Macs have always done well with animation. But Compiz is the beast!

At first Compiz was full with a load of crap that distracted and hurt me. Going through it’s options opened up tonnes of possibility. There are some things on there that I just don’t understand but I tweaked and trialled and errored and got my desired effects. They’re fast and smooth and subtle enough. I actually hate to say it, but some of them are handy too.

So, the fonts

Windows has put me in a world where all rasterised fonts are seamless. I’ve never given it much thought before. When changing from no-aliasing to aliasing to ClearType I noticed what was happening but not once did I get truly appalled at any one of those settings. When I used Macs I’d be aware the fonts were rather soft but it added to the sleek interface. Fonts were still always beautiful. Linux has smashed that vision for me.

I mean what is that? The default font set-up that I’m sure has been optimised for a blind person. I stumbled across some tutorials that let you change them to the default old-style Windows fonts. Wicked. I’m back in 1995!

Installing the TrueType Microsoft fonts helps a lot. I’m using Arial for the most of my interface and after tweaking around with the settings I’m actually slightly fond of FreeType2. I would go as far as to say it shows the Mac up. I did a side on comparison and it’s obvious Microsoft has left Linux in the dust. Guess what OS owns what font?

Close up here

Don’t get me started on that excuse for a rasterisation that GIMP uses, or how difficult the interface was to a Photoshop user (I couldn’t even align the text elements!). It’s obvious that Windows XP looks clear and aesthetically pleasing. The Ubuntu fonts don’t look too bad. I’d be interested to compare it to how Mac renders stuff and I’ll give it a go later.

So Microsoft, you’ve made me think my life’s been held back by your operating system but in truth, you’ve hidden the ugly potential that is font rendering from me for so many years and for it I thank you. Just looking at the comparison makes me laugh. Still, one probably cost near billions of dollars to develop while other was free.

Not too fast Microsoft…

On a side note there is evidence to suggest Microsoft has been getting lazy of recent with their UI. I’d expect that from Linux because it’s made up like Frankenstein but from an expensive OS at the top of it’s field I figure that’s taking the piss. Reading that blog did make me think how bollocks Internet Explorer’s interface is. Using Google Chrome has put me in a new state of expectation where before I just put up with it. Saying that IE6 has a nice interface. Maybe Bill should’ve stopped trying to be a fox.

I’ve never had a problem with Windows at all and I absolutley love it, but I’m really taken by the ideas behind Linux. If I can also legally run an OS and a DAW for free how could I not? Another factor is the element of control. At first the thought of building an OS from various components seemed bollocks to me but after adding bits on and taking bits off it gives a sense of control you just can’t get in Windows.

A while back I tried out openSUSE 10.3 with KDE and Debian Etch with GNOME and wanted to fall in love so badly. I found the compatability a big problem as drivers very rarley “just worked”. I had to give up because I couldn’t get it to connect to the Internet without lugging my PC upstairs and plugging it into the router and sound and graphics just weren’t working.

This time around I had an idea of what I wanted an OS to do – music recording and production and web design. I had a more educated surf around and through my good mate Joe Barker was encouraged to use Ubuntu. This was around the time that Jaunty, versions 9.04 was about to make a release.

I’ve always had reservations about Ubuntu. Isn’t it just Debian for children? It’s always come across and whiney and too easy to use. But now with my previous Linux experience I knew this couldn’t be

So I tested Jaunty in VirtualBox, got all impressed and decided I was gonna do it. Another quick surf around brought me to Ubuntu Studio. The distribution looked ideal for my wants. I got as far as 800×600 with no wireless. I persisted.

Within a week I had my wireless working and resolution back. The resolution looked at the monitors EDID and I was using an old LCD TV that reported it’s native was 800×600. In Windows it’s just a matter of un-ticking “Hide modes that this monitor cannot display” and I tried hard to get the same thing here. It didn’t happen so I found a 1280×1024 TFT lying around. The Nvidia graphics driver wasn’t working and I tried hard again to fix it with no sucess.

My first thoughts are this – man it’s ugly! I have to dedicate a good proportion of my life to getting it working and it looks like this? It’s free so I shouldn’t expect professional artwork or a consistent GUI. It does not compare asthetically or ergenomically to Windows in the slightest. The fonts are hideous beyond words.

One thing has to be said though – the community support is beyond emense. It’s honestly breath-taking. I’m able to diagnose my problems sometimes down to the exact detail using Google. The Ubuntu forums is full of litterally thousands of enthusiasts helping each other out. Ubuntu has a lot to boast about here and it’s inspired me to keep going.

I’ve persisted since and here’s a list of issues I’ve solved:

• Understanding NDIS wireless connection
• Coming to terms with EDID
• Making the fonts look a lot better
• Working with websites
• Recording and mastering
• Getting nVidia drivers working

I’m glad I’ve persisted. Now that everything works I couldn’t be happier. Compiz makes me smile a lot. I’m happily running it day to day without much to gripe about. It does what I wanted. I’ve even contributed back to the community

I can’t recommend Linux if you’re not tech savvy or not looking to put a lot of effort into getting things working. It’s made me appreciate Windows a hell of a lot more. If you want astonishing results for relativley small effort and you know your PHP from your KDE then you should be using Linux today. Damn it’s so good.