So what have I been up to? Firstly I’ve been on holiday with my family. Where did I go? Wales. Saundersfoot, near Tenby in south Pembrokeshire, to be precise. Here’s a photo, click it to make it bigger.

This photo pretty much sums up every day of that fortnight. Well, that and about a hundred hours of gaming on my phone, something I’ll refuse to indulge in whilst at home, normally.

So apart from getting drunk in Welsh taverns, what else have I done? I’ve been recording and mixing down demo recordings for post-rock band Former Miss Czechoslovakia, for who I also play lead guitar and sing lead vocals for, a very odd mix I know.

I also got a car, but because of ridiculous circumstances, I haven’t been able to drive it to work in the seven days that I’ve had it for. It’s currently sitting in a garage, while hopefully mechanics are working ten to the dozen fixing the steering and the boot-cap (the what?) so I can take it to another garage tonight and then they can give it a full service and a cam-belt change. I kind of know what that bit means.

So for the mean time I’m catching the trains and buses, listening to really bad music while I’m on them and trying to find time to get these bloody mixes down.

For now I’ll leave you with a link to a rather intriguing tweet of mine.

I’ve already scared one member of the house-hold by shouting and clutching at a pillow with more vigour than I’ve ever know. I’ve gotten over-emotional at a silly episode of Doctor Who, and shouted at a politician on a rolling news channel.

So how long’s it been? 11 hours. Not even a day.

Why am I giving up? I’m skint. Also I need to sort my life out a bit, and I guess cutting out the crap is a kind-of start to it all. Wahoo. I’m also getting a car and don’t want to crash it because I was too busy rolling one at the junction. (I can still remember the points in the roads and journeys where I used to light up.)

Couple months back I did a fortnight before crashing on a really sticky night out. I smoked because I was in town I was drunk and looking for highs. I didn’t pick-up the fags during my hangover the next day like I thought I would- I got over it and carried on without them. But then something happened and I marched to the nearest shop for 20 Embassy number 1s. And I was back to my ten-to-fifteen a day.

I stayed indoors last week for the Sunday and the bank holiday. I was playing on my new phone and it did such a good job of distracting me I didn’t need to smoke. But then I had to get the bus really early the next day and the absence of nicotine from my system made the physical pain distracting. I had too much work on to loose concentration.

But now I’ve not got much work on because I done it all. I was quitting this morning, and there was a point where I was really happy I hadn’t gone out for a smoke at all, and then, something happened.

These “something happened” moments suck, but they’re not related to my smoking (except they only seem to happen when I’m trying to quit) and I figured I need to get over them. Shit will happen in life, and a cigarette seems so insignificant. So I’m going to learn to take news like a real person, and talk when things are upsetting instead. Also, the less I try and quit the less these catastrophic events will happen. I’m sure of it!

So why am I blogging this? Why is this being broadcast? Why have I dramatically changed my grammar?

BECAUSE I’M GOING FUCKING CRAZY!

Or I’m just being a bit of a wuss…

I’ll let my profile on my family’s website introduce this one [warning: very outdated information can be found on this page - I'm talking about 6 years out here!].

John Christopher Nigel Gutteridge was born September 26 1988 5:30am. [...]. After a long debate by the family he was named John but informally called Jack.

My actual name is John. If I’m being formal, I’ll use John. So at work, my colleagues call me John for example. If I’m talking to my bank, registering something (you get the idea ).

So let me set this straight, I’m called Jack but my actual name is John, right? My parents called me Jack, my family called me Jack, my friend called me Jack. Simple, right?

This used to prove very confusing to pupils in the same class as me back in the day. In Primary School it was okay, because I only had to explain the situation to one teacher a year. However, by Secondary School and into College I was having to explain myself to a tutor about once a week.

My fellow learners would be amazed and bewildered by this two-named freak

But it’s completely justified! All these morons thought I had some weird naming complex. Even the Wikipedia article on “Jack” agrees with me:

In English it is the diminutive form of the name John [...]

It was used back in the day (I’m talking around the Great War here) by a father called John calling his son John, but to avoid confusion would use the nickname Jack. Yeah?

So there! Get over it

Image source: BBC News Magazine – 7 questions on baby names

So I’ve migrated to WordPress and I’m happy. I nearly had a theme down but I changed my ethics half way through and ended my love affair with Microsoft. But we’re delving into geek territory here. More on that later.

For now I leave you with this. It’s my very subtle office workstation. Didn’t want to settle with one monitor see.

So if you haven’t noticed, we’ve been getting a fair bit of snow recently. Today it was about a foot deep. I eventually got on the roads.

Was fine until I got there. Then things got a little slippy.

I came off of the roundabout that leads to work and my back-end kept going. I came off the road and right into a hedge. Whoops.

So I leave it, head to the office for help. Something like “yeah my parking’s a bit improv”. We got her out. She hadn’t suffered too badly, a little damage under the bumper. I’m amazed I didn’t take anyone out (I’m parked on the pavement).

Harborough wasn’t too bad on Monday, but Leicester was. Today it’s the opposite. Driving like this after only passing 6 months ago ain’t fun. Ah well!

This was my car before the journey

Well January has been nice to me so far. Last week I awoke to snow. I beifly thought about how this would effect road conditions but having passed in July I was fairly ignorant to it all – and blissfully so!

I hit the Southway through Blaby and couldn’t understand for the hell of me why the lass infront driving her kids to college insisted on 20mph. It took me all of 10 mins more to figure it out.

Instead of changing my usual route through country lanes and narrow bridges, I thought I’d carry on as normal. Applying brakes on ice just makes the car skid. I didn’t think about this before. So at a steady 5mph though untreated roads I went until I got to the prangs. It was fairly obvious. It took half an hour for the traffic to turn around and head back. I managed not to find a ditch or hit a car.

Still, lesson learnt.